Race To The Ring


I was casually scrolling down my Instagram timeline this week and I saw all these new pretty rings everyone, but me, seemed to have. My first thought was, “Is there a sale I don’t know about?”

After a second look, my eyes got so B I G they could have popped right out of the sockets.

“WTF, is everyone getting married?!”

It was happening so fast as if everyone was in competition and if you’re single, you lose.

Exactly one week has gone by since Valentine’s Day. Sometime during this week I think I blinked and missed the engagement memo. Except… I feel like this every year especially around the holidays. Over the past couple of years, I’ve noticed an increase in the amount of young adults deciding to pack it up and shack up with their significant other. Why? Love is beautiful and if you find it young you should keep it, I guess, but what’s wrong with a long-term relationship? Does having a girlfriend/boyfriend for 6 months really justify you tying the knot? IDK

A post I saw this week read, “Getting married at 22 sounds a lot like leaving a party at 9:30 pm.”

I’m 22 and I approve this message.

Old friends, new friends, high school, college, work friends…

The people I associate with regularly are, on average, between the ages 19-24, and they all seem to be making this transformation to a life of domestication.  I remember just a short while ago, we were underage trying to figure out what type of juice goes with Bacardi Dragon Berry. Now you’re asking me what is the best dish when  hosting family dinners?…um ask my mom.

Maybe my biological clock is broken.

You want a baby and I just got footie pajamas for Christmas.

I know we’re supposed to grow up and stuff, but there’s levels and you’re trying to use a cheat code in the game of life right now. If not most, a lot of young adults are just graduating college and/or are trying to figure themselves and their goals  out. I know there’s a few of us who seem put together and on the right path, but let’s be real,  we are nowhere near meeting our full potential. We just haven’t been here long enough. We haven’t made all the necessary mistakes and this is the best time to make them.

Straight out of high school, I was in a relationship for four years and we lived together and it was wonderful, until it wasn’t. However, even then I encouraged my significant other to go out with his friends and gain the life experiences needed that you can’t get in a textbook or a blog post. Without all those wild parties, how would you know your drinking limit? If it wasn’t for that person who left you hanging, how would you know how to deal with rejection? You never left your state, how do you know there is actually a world out there?

It’s hard to not be anxious when there is so much wonder to life and love. We should be excited to learn about them, but we should also remember it takes time to master them.

Did you know that “people who marry when they are over 25 years of age have a 24% decreased risk of divorce?” (From UberFacts.) Why do you think this is?

I think it’s because they’ve had time to live and are prepared for the challenges of  being monogamous, raising/providing for their family, and passing on those life lessons to their children.

I met the most ratchet lady at the bar last summer. She was acting like she had never been to a lounge before, I mean twerking on EVERYTHING. Stage, chairs, men, etc. She was celebrating her divorce at 27… No wonder. She said she had been with the same guy since high school and they got married at 23. Not at all saying, we should live our lives at a bar/club, but she missed out on years of just celebrating her youth.

Celebrate your youth. Travel, party, network, learn and then settle down.

“Love will find you when you find you.”

How are you so sure of yourself and what you want when you have JUST gotten from under the watchful eyes of your parent/parents and have been institutionalized since the age of 5?

In this moment, we should be setting personal goals and working to achieve them. The right person will come along and fit right in to them, when they are supposed to.

Don’t get me wrong I’m happy for you guys who think you’ve found “the one”, I just don’t get why you and your one can’t hold hands and hang out for a while. What’s the rush?

Forever is a long time and right now is just, well, right now.

Best Regards,


P.S. Thanks to my friend Kelechi, who asked me to write about this months ago.


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